Marriage Equity

In Goddard's (2007) book, he mentioned about how couples in today's society try to reach marriage equity. He says that most couples try to reach this by splitting up and designating chores between the two. He mentions that this tactic is not very effective since it encourages "score-keeping" and to keep a tally of their contributions. This can actually cause further conflict in a marriage when spouses start to argue over chores that didn't get done, who was supposed to do them, and the lack of help getting something done when the other person may be swamped with work. He then goes on to discuss that it's best for both individuals to put in all of their effort. 

This reminded me of one of my marriage classes. My teacher talked about how couples can't give or do 50-50 because it just doesn't work and conflicts arise. He said that the best thing that a couple can do for their marriage is for both of them to give 100%. To give their marriage and all of their efforts their all. By giving your marriage your everything instead of only part of it, you help strengthen your marriage and there's less likely to be any fights over someone not doing enough or doing their part. I've also seen this in my own marriage. When my husband and I first got married, we would do what we felt to be our part and then leave the rest for the other person. However, some of those other things then didn't get done and we would then end up fighting about it. Lately however, we have been better about giving everything our all. Fights have gone down a lot and everything is getting done. It really does work best to have both give their all rather than waiting on each other or dividing everything up to seem fair.