This week was very interesting and informative. The biggest thing that we talked about was same-sex attraction. Now I am not saying any of this to put them down or belittle them, but just help create a better and greater understanding. We watched a video: "Understanding Same-Sex Attraction" and this is a documentary video that also has those who were once homosexual and their interviews. It also shows how they're not "born that way" but that they had something happen that created those feelings for the same gender. Research that has been done shows that a lot of it has to do with what has happened to them in their childhood or because they lacked something in their childhood. For example, in the video, it showed that a large percentage become gay when they were sexually molested as a child. Now I know that there are probably some that would say, "Well I wasn't so I was born with it." In the video for one of the interviews there was a man who had been molested when he was two, but he didn't remember it. His sister told him it happened. But the experience at the time of course was so traumatizing for him at that age that it still created huge impact on his mentality. Now this obviously doesn't happen in every case, but a lot of the time it does. Now for those who weren't molested, a lot of times had the lack of male relationships and models in their life. Say that a boy who seems feminine but isn't gay, he gets along with and makes friends quickly with the girls. This can make the other boys upset and jealous because all of the girls talk to and like him. So they make fun of him and leave him out. This a lot of times creates a yearning for the boy to be liked and accepted by the other boys. Since they can so easily make friends with girls and they can talk to them no problem, the boys are what become desirable to them. This can be difficult for a lot of gays, especially if they don't want to be that way. And I'm sure it's reassuring to them for them to know that they're not born that way, Homosexuality: What Science Can and Cannot Say, and that they can change. In the video, it show the account and experiences of some men who once had homosexual feelings, but through therapy and help, were able to overcome those and become straight. All of them tell and say about how they are so much happier now.
Something else that we talked about this week, that I thought was pretty important, was gender equality. The different genders are constantly trying to say who has what role or if there even should be any roles. That by having roles creates inequality, when in reality, it does the opposite. My grandparents have what they call "pink" and "blue" jobs. This signifies and lays out who does what part around the house. I have never ever heard either of my grandparents give a single complaint about the chores or roles they have. They created a system where the work is distributed evenly and by ability. They have used their gender differences to create an equal and functional ground in the home. There are also some issues where women get mad that men don't want women to do things or say that they can't, when those women feel that they can do just as well. And a lot of the time, it's not because they think that woman can't, it because they enjoy doing it and they enjoying helping. For example, on my mission, every time I was carrying something heavy, an Elder would ask if I would like help. I would give the typical woman answer of saying, "No. I got it." And there were times I would catch disappointment on their faces. While I was on my mission, I heard a lot of the phrase, "chivalry is dead". I thought back to those experiences and realized, its dead, because women killed it because they wanted "equality". So I decided that every time the Elders offered help, even though I didn't need it, I would take them up on it. It made a huge difference. When I first started doing it, I could tell that when the Elders asked, they expected me to say no. So I'm sure you can imagine some of their surprised expressions when I actually said yes. Then they got happy!! I noticed that as I kept doing that, the happier they got and the more I got asked if they could help. Even the amount of Elders who asked went up. Even if it was something so small as carrying a medium sized box that wasn't heavy at all, they asked to help. They find joy in being able to help us and that they can actually make a difference or still be of use. It has nothing to do if they think we're weak or not. As time went on, my friendship with these missionaries improved. This same principle can work for anyone or couple. It can help strengthen relationships as a bond is made. We all have different strengths and abilities that can help enhance society and the home. So shouldn't we work on making those differences equal and become strengths, rather than trying to use them to create inequality and contention?
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